VICTORIA'S MEMOIR

Just a Little GIrl

Suddenly, the space through which I was soaring tunneled and narrowed and when I could go no further I stopped falling—like being stuck in the tip of a funnel. Then, I felt an immediate release from my physical body—like I was being delivered out of myself. I literally felt my life force—my spirit—leave my body.

In this newly birthed “spirit self,” I retained all of my mental faculties. I could see, remember and reason. I could feel emotions, and I still had all my memories and my personality. Yet there was a euphoric realization that I felt no pain—I was somehow disconnected from that earthly burden. I felt wonderful freedom, no longer restricted to the limitations of my human body.

I had a clear presence of mind, will and emotions—everything about me was still intact but not in a physical sense. I felt like I could move anywhere, through walls, even the cosmic universe if I wanted to, but then I realized something was holding me back from ultimate freedom. It was as if an invisible tether or umbilical cord connected me to some kind of weight.

Then, from a vantage point high above, I looked down at what was keeping me from experiencing complete freedom and what I saw amazed me. It was my own body. It didn’t even look like me. My color looked wrong, sort of a greenish yellow. Severe edema made me look puffy and bloated. My eyes looked swollen shut, like a defeated boxer. There were tubes everywhere. And I instinctively knew the body I was looking at was not pregnant—that my baby was gone.

A deep sadness washed over my spirit as I continued to look down at my body, and that’s when I realized I wasn’t alone. Hovering to my right was a great and powerful messenger of glowing bronze and amber, clothed in shining white. In a split second, I realized I recognized him and knew him by name…

An excerpt from: Just a Little Girl by Dr. Victoria Sarvadi—Coming September 2016

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